Romance For Dummies
by jennypc
Summary: Sebastian tries to be romantic and show Blaine how much he cares about him but it always ends in disaster.


**Summary - Prompt: Could I see Seblaine where Sebastian tries to be romantic and show Blaine how much he cares about him but it always ends in disaster (accidentally giving Blaine food poisoning, setting something on fire with so many candles, hitting Blaine's head on the wall while trying to carry him upstairs, etc). Blaine sits Sebastian down and tells him how he doesn't have to try to prove he cares about Blaine because Blaine knows with all the little things Sebastian does.**

**Words - 1729**

**Rating - T**

**Authors notes - OK so this is in response to a prompt i got a few weeks back. I have taken the idea and tried to stick with it as much as possible. It seems very different to what i usually write. I hope people enjoy it. Feedback would be appreciated as i feel i rushed this but wanted to get it done! x 3**

Sebastian Smythe was the perfect human being. He never got anything wrong. He excelled in school, in sport, in his job. In everything. He hated it when he didn't. It frustrated him and only made him try harder. What Sebastian didn't realise is that some things just come naturally.

One of his main challenges in life was being romantic. When it came to romancing he faltered. Sure, Sebastian got guys and like everything else eventually he got the best guy there was. Blaine Anderson. The love of his life. His soul mate. For Blaine, Sebastian wanted to be the king of romance. If romance was rock and roll, Sebastian wanted to be Elvis.

The first time he was romantic, he cooked dinner.

"_Right, come on. Sit."_

"_Seb, this looks amazing." Blaine exclaimed as he looked down at the table in front of him that was covered in candles, plates of hot food which were perfectly presented and two large glasses of white wine. He followed suit as Sebastian guided him into his seat and pushed his chair in for him, before returning to his own._

"_I've never cooked anything before." Sebastian admitted looking a bit sheepish as his boyfriend of six months laughed and raised his eyebrows in shock._

"_Well aren't I the lucky one then?" Blaine mumbled across the table, his eyes full of lust._

"_You better believe it, Killer. Happy six month anniversary." He toasted as he raised his glass and winked at Blaine across the table. "I love you."_

"_I love you too, Seb."_

The first time he tried to be romantic; it resulted in him and his boyfriend throwing up into the wee hours of the morning, one either side of the toilet seat, passing water back and forth between them. Later on that evening, Sebastian commented that maybe the chicken wasn't supposed to be pink.

The second time he tried to be romantic, he proposed.

"_What are all these candles for?" asked Blaine, looking around their apartment that was covered in tiny night lights, placed on any available surface._

"_To make it look nice." Sebastian answered simply._

"_What for?"_

"_For us. Now come and sit down." Sebastian demanded as he pulled Blaine by his wrist and pushed him down onto the couch, while he stayed standing. "I need to tell you something."_

"_Oh jeez, Seb. What have you done?" Blaine exasperated, leaning his head back against the back of the couch._

"_Nothing. Look at me, B." He commanded and waited until Blaine was staring back at him. "I love you."_

"_I love you, too." Came the automatic almost instant reply from Blaine, as always causing Sebastian to smile._

"_I know. I hope you realise how much I mean it and how much it means to me. You're everything to me. You're amazing. You're beautiful" Sebastian cooed as he got down on one knee, causing Blaine's eyes to open wide like saucers._

"_I want to spend my life with you, Blaine . Will you marry-"_

_The next thing Blaine knew, Sebastian was up on his feet, dancing around trying to extinguish five candles that he had knocked over while kneeling._

"_Shit. Shit." Sebastian cursed while stomping on the floor, to check that the flames were fully out._

"_Marry you?" Blaine asked quietly, barely loud enough for anyone else to hear._

"_Shit! It's burnt the carpet." Sebastian moaned, hands now on hips, annoyed look on his face worried about how much it would cost to re-carpet the lounge._

"_You want me to marry you?" Blaine exclaimed, which caused Sebastian to pause what he was doing and look back down at his boyfriend who was now perched on the edge of the couch looking up at him expectantly._

"_Yeah." Sebastian replied, a goofy smile appearing on his face._

The second time he tried to be romantic; it resulted in Blaine accepting his proposal, them making love on the longue floor, getting carpet burns themselves and a $500 dollar bill for a replacement carpet which Sebastian said was ridiculous and a rip off because after all "it was only a couple of freaking candles.".

The third time he tried to be romantic, they got married.

"_Sebastian you don't have to carry me!" Blaine squealed, unable to stop the laughter from erupting from his throat as his boyfriend hooked his arms under his back and crook of his legs and lifted him into the air._

"_Blaine, that's what married couples do! The groom carries the bride over the threshold." He replied and winked down at Blaine who was still laughing but also rolling his eyes._

"_Why am I the bride?" Blaine asked, a look of confusion on his face._

"_Oh come on, Killer. Do you really need to ask that one?" Sebastian asked, sticking his tongue out and blowing Blaine a kiss as he took a step at a time up the stairs to their apartment._

"_If you drop me, I'm not going to be happy." Blaine moaned, a smile still on his lips as he took in Sebastian muscles working away under his wedding suit, struggling with Blaine's weight._

"_Oh shut up, I'm not going to drop you." Sebastian said through gritted teeth as they finally made it to the top of the stairs. "You get the door, babe."_

"_Well I think that should be the job of the 'big', 'strong' groom!" Blaine said as he winked back at Sebastian before reaching with the key to unlock the door and eventually pushed it open and signalled for Sebastian to make his way into the apartment._

"_Now, Blaine this is important. This is the first time we are entering a home as a married couple. I hope you are going to take notice. This is usually the sentimental stuff you gush your heart out over." mocked Sebastian._

"_Shut up, you idiot." Blaine replied and punches Sebastian on the arm playfully as they started to move towards the door._

"_As you wish, Mr Smyth-Anderso. Welcome to you new-"_

"_-Fuck. Seb! My head!" Blaine cried as it whacked hard against the door frame._

"_Sorry! Shit, sorry, B!" Sebastian said, a hint of worry in his voice, his eyes dashing back and forth between the door frame and the quickly swelling lump on the side of Blaine's forehead._

"_Put. Me. Down." Blaine said pointedly, glaring at Sebastian._

_Sebastian put him down almost straight away and took a step back as Blaine turned and faced him._

"_You're absolutely useless. You're a liability!" Blaine exclaimed, the smile now returning to his face as he jabbed a finger against Sebastian's chest._

"_I know. I'm sorry." Sebastian said sheepishly, wrapping his arm around Blaine's waist once the prodding had ceased. "I love you."_

"_I love you too, Mr Anderson-Smythe." Blaine said before reaching up and placing a kiss on his husband's lips._

"_Smythe-Anderson" Sebastian mumbled in-between kisses._

"_Mmhmm, we'll see."_

The third time he tried to be romantic; it resulted in a huge lump on Blaine's head, an hour of applying frozen peas and the consummation of their marriage, before finally falling asleep arguing about which order their surnames would appear on their wedding certificate.

It wasn't until 3 years later that Sebastian commented on how useless he was at being romantic and Blaine didn't argue against it.

"Did you hear me?" Sebastian asked, looking up from the newspaper article titled 'How to romance your lover!' and across at his husband.

"Yep." Blaine replied simply.

"You think I'm useless then?"

"No." Blaine replied simply again.

"Every time I try and be romantic, I always mess up. Like when we had our anniversary and I gave us both food poisoning and when I proposed and set the carpet on fire!" Sebastian moaned.

"And when you nearly knocked me out on our wedding night!" Blaine interjected, now grinning back at his husband.

"The less said about that the better." Sebastian mumbled and shook his head before returning to his article.

Blaine watched as his husbands face furrowed with annoyance as he read more of the article and all the romantic things that couples should do that he more often than not failed at. He pushed himself up from table and walked behind Sebastian's chair, bent down, lent his chin on his husbands shoulder and wrapped his arms around his chest, crumpling the newspaper much to Sebastian's annoyance and placed a kiss on his neck.

"You, Sebastian Smythe- Anderson, are one of the most romantic people I know."

"Yeah right." Sebastian scoffed.

"It's true." Blaine stated and felt as Sebastian shrugged underneath him. "Who else would sit next to me while vomited up buckets of sick? Who else would make love to me on a burnt carpet and then pay $500 for a new one? Who else would hold a bag of frozen peas to my head for an hour on my wedding night? Hmm?"

"That makes me sound like an even bigger loser than I thought I was, B." Sebastian mumbled but he was now smiling.

"No it doesn't. You did all those things and you didn't even think about them and they are some of the most romantic times we've had."

"You think?" Sebastian asked now turning to look Blaine in the eye.

"Yep. You don't realise how romantic you are. You're always doing little things that I notice, but are probably just habit for you and it makes my heart skip a beat every time."

"Like?" Sebastian mumbled.

"Umm, making my coffee in my favourite mug."

"Go on."

"Stroking my hair when we watch movies."

"Mmm."

"Eating all the onions off my bits of pizza because you know I don't like them."

Sebastian laughed and raised his eyebrows to signal Blaine to continue.

"Buying me flowers every Monday."

"Don't you dare tell anyone that!"

"I won't. Giving me all the yellow M&Ms because you know they're my favourite. Letting me win on Mario Kart, I know you do. Cooking me dinner, every night. Readjusting my car seat after you've used it?"

"Ok, ok. You're grasping at straws now!" Sebastian muttered.

"Maybe, but you are romantic. In your own way. It comes naturally." Blaine said while tilting his head to one side and smiling broadly.

"Figures." Sebastian said pointedly.

"Huh?"

"I excel at everything; I knew I must have been good at romance as well." Sebastian concluded before reaching in for another, this time more hungry, kiss.


End file.
